Prologue

Lyrics

[Jingle Bells: Sped Up] Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh, hey [Skit 1: Santa, Girl, Bobby Sherman] Ho ho, step right up little girl And tell your department store Santa what you want for Christmas Santa, I brought you a present A present for Santa? Yes Santa, it's a bottle of Stench mouthwash Don't let the specter of bad breath spoil your Christmas Get a bottle of Stench mouthwash for your Santa today [Jingle Bells: Sped Up] Oh, dashing through the snow In a one-horse open sleigh O'er the fields we go Laughing all thе way, hey [Skit 2] Don't shortchange your family at Christmas Sometimеs a cash on hand don't cover expenses for what we wanna buy When that happens Don't disappoint the loved one's who are counting on yous Just give us a call at Shady Finance We give you all the cash you need to show them how much you really think of them And weekly payments don't begin 'til spring Remember, for Christmas cash it's Shady Finance, an enforcement company [Jingle Bells: Sped Up] Oh, bells on bobtails ring Making spirits bright What fun it is to ride and sing A sleighing song tonight, hey [Skit 3: Kid, Father, Mother] Mommy, can you help me wrap my presents? Here where did you put the Christmas lights? Hey Chris, I think somethings in the kitchen Christmas tensions building up? Too much to do in too little time? Relax with a Cloud Nine tablet It's the little green pill with hydrobarbaphenacloradiethelmisilicon That can get you through the holidays [Jingle Bells: Sped Up] Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh, hey [Skit 4: Billy Butane] Hi friends, Billy Butane here and we're really celebrating Christmas with big green cash deals on every new and used car at our fabulous Santa's Playground Used Car Lot Bring the whole family to see thousands of dollars' worth of Christmas decorations spread over acres of great used car bargains Down Dopey down This Christmas treat yourself and your family to a real Christmas present And save yourself cash in green stamps all at the same time We give you more for your Christmas purchasing dollar friends And isn't that what Christmas is all about? [Outro: Sped Up] Woah, what's the use?