Lyrics

I took her with me To the Christmas office party, mistake She did a line and started Spouting all her liberal garbage Bro, I'm so ashamed I never heard such shit in all my life I hoped one day to mold you Into the perfect wife But you blew my hopes sky high The bitch went nuts Started talking about politics In front of all my bosses Bullshit from the Internet The bitch went nuts I'll never be a partner at this rate Not with Jane fucking Fonda Jr as my date Oh no, oh no, no, oh It took me and a couple of men to restrain her You should've seen her When she freaked out and keyed John Franklin Jr's Brand new Beamer She called us bigots with her fist in the air And as she did they all could see all her armpit hair Now they think that I'm a fucking asshole The bitch went nuts Started talking about vegetables To the wives of my coworkers Yeah, cruelty to animals She thinks because she reads books She must be smarter But now when I close my eyes I'll be fucking Jimmy Carter Oh no, oh no, no, oh no, no Couldn't you have just nodded and smile From nine to twelve P.M Instead of telling your conspiracy theories To all my bosses and all my friends? The bitch went nuts She started putting down the Christians And all about what the white man Did to the Indians How could I know that she'd never done blow before? She shouted, "Fuck Dick Cheney" And then she puked on the Franklin's floor Oh no, oh no, oh no, no Oh no, no, oh no, oh right