Custer’s Last Man

Lyrics

[Hook] Men have walked and men have climbed They live like men, and so they die so bold But now it all comes to life The tale of Custer's faithful night untold [Verse] Voice 1: Hey, is this where Custer's Last Stand took place in 1976? Voice 2: Yeah, that's right! Hey! Listen, here that? Voice 1: Sounds like someone digging in that hole over there to me! Sarge, may we investigate that hole over there? Sarge: Alright, everyone on the double to that hole over there! Voice 1: There's a old man down there digging! Sarge: Hey, old man! Hey, old man down there! Old man, can you hear me? Hey! Old Man: Please, Mr. Custer! I don't wanna go! Sarge: Here, grab onto this rope, we'll pull you up Old Man: I don't wanna get scalped! Sittin' Bull and his friends Waitin' up there for my scalp, you fellas ain't gonna fool me! Sarge: We're the US Army, this is 1960! Voice 4: Well what am I doin' here? Voice 1: Hey, he's wearing a 7th Calvary uniform! And he's still digging! What happened, old man? Old Man: Me and Mr. Custer was the only ones left, and- Voice 1: What did you do? Old Man: All I could do was cry They tied Mr. Custer up in a fully looking thing Voice 1: What did they tie him up with? Was it chains? Old Man: Nope, wasn't no chains Voice 1: Was it belts? Old Man: Nope, it wasn't no belts neither Voice 1: Was it, rope? Old Man: Nope, wasn't none of them neither Voice 1: Then what did they tie him with? Voice 2: What was it, what was it? Old Man: It was an itsy bitsy, teeny weeny Yellow polka dot bikini Then early that next morning, all the Indians left except one I snook up on him, and pow, I let him have it with old betsy I felt sorry for the fella after I shot him, though And I said "Mr. Indian, is there any last words you got before You go to your huntin' ground?" Indian: Tell'um Laura, I Love-um her! Old Man: I untied Mr. Custer, and we ran lickety-split Before them other Indians come back Then Mr. Custer broke out and started runnin' and yelpin' And yellin' Voice 1: Well what was he yellin', what was he sayin'? Voice 2: What was he sayin'? Custer: I'm a yogi, I'm a yogi baby! Old Man: What? Custer: I'm a yogi, I'm a yogi baby! Old Man: What? Custer: I'm a yogi! Old Man: After Mr. Custer ran off thinkin' he was One of them yogi fellas, the Indians caught me again! That's the reason you fellas see me diggin' now! And the medicine man told me that he was gonna let me go Scott-free if, if I could Voice 2: If you could what, if you could what? Old man: Move two mountains, drain a river Dive, swim the deep ends, oh, and pull the stop from the sky And I'm on my second mountain right now So get away from me right now! Get away! [Hook] Men have walked and men have climbed They live like men, and so they die so bold But now it all has come to life The tale of Custer's faithful night been's told [Outro] Old Man: Oh geez, fellas, get on away from me And let me drain this river and climb this mountain Oh fellas, let me alone, will you? Oh, get away from me, fellas Please let me climb this mountain!