A list of all the things that I regret

Song Meaning

The narrator is grappling with a past relationship, meticulously cataloging their regrets in an attempt to process the pain. This act of writing isn't cathartic, but rather a way to confront the lingering memories and the self-inflicted damage. The dominant tone is one of deep, introspective sorrow, tinged with a desperate hope for reconciliation, even if it means repeating past errors. The core tension lies in the narrator's inability to move on, evidenced by the repeated phrase "I struggle to let it go." They acknowledge their own fault in "mess[ing] up the beauty of us" and admit to behaviors like crying during arguments, which they knew their partner disliked. This self-awareness is painful because it's coupled with a resignation that fundamental change might be impossible, as suggested by the chilling line, "I assure you I would do the same mistakes." The most striking craft element is the literal "list" that structures the song, transforming abstract regrets into numbered points. This methodical approach contrasts sharply with the emotional chaos described. The repetition of "I regret" and the specific, almost mundane details in the chorus – "cried during every discussion" – ground the grand emotional weight in relatable, everyday failures. The outro reveals a darker purpose: the list is also an attempt to forget, highlighting the complex, self-destructive nature of their coping mechanism. Ultimately, the lyrics hit hard because they capture the paralyzing grip of regret and the painful self-knowledge that often accompanies lost love. The narrator’s vulnerability in admitting their desperate need for attention and their feeling of inadequacy, combined with the bleak outlook on personal change, creates a potent portrait of someone trapped by their past actions and unable to escape the emotional fallout.