My Ex

Song Meaning

The lyrics paint a vivid picture of a night fueled by alcohol and poor decisions. After a few drinks, the speaker, feeling "everything is fine," reaches out to an ex. This impulsive act quickly spirals into a familiar cycle of regret and self-recrimination. The central tension here lies in the immediate aftermath of a bad choice. The ex, initially described as someone who "did me dirty," is momentarily seen as "so amazing" under the influence, causing the speaker to forget "the devil she was." This stark contrast highlights how intoxication blurs judgment, leading to actions that are instantly regretted. The most striking craft element is the relentless repetition of the core mistake and its consequence: "texted my ex / Said come to my bed / Now I regret." This cyclical phrasing, coupled with the desperate plea in the chorus, "Don't judge me / I already judge myself," powerfully conveys a deep sense of self-loathing. The speaker isn't looking for external absolution; they are already their harshest critic, trapped in a loop of self-sabotage. Ultimately, these lyrics are effective because they tap into a universal experience of making regrettable choices and the internal battle that follows. The line "when its love I hesitate" suggests this isn't just about one ex, but a deeper pattern of emotional avoidance. The speaker is "running thru the circles," acknowledging their mistakes while seemingly unable to break free from them, creating a poignant sense of vulnerability and frustration.