Lyrics

If I could become A stranger to this place Once again I would hide between the years And live there But in the present day The entropy remains Every time I find a home I just want to run away [...] The way the sun hits The corners of my room It reminds me of a dream I had Of a world where i was still afraid But where I also belonged Deep in the sunlit cracks In the pavement Sometimes, late at night I look up the names Of the things that were done to me And I try to imagine them Slithering through my blood Coiled around my DNA And on the bus to somewhere else I felt like a wasted stray Run away forget it all again And disappear Aching longing for a lifetime From someone else's mind Can I be someone else And I leave this all behind? The cold Vancouver rain I don't know who to blame For the hole That i feel inside my brain Is there a way to feel Like I can be something More than this A rusted-out carcass Of the dreams That I still remember Take me back I want to know What safety feels like I was supposed to be a person I was supposed to be A fucking person They asked me what I wanted to be But I didn't know I couldn't know They made me forget I still don't know Sometimes I feel like a wasp egg Parasitizing a beautiful insect Hatching into a fungus A rare bird A silk thread that reaches All the way up into the sky There's nothing here for me And I just keep staring at the sky I hate everything I am Oh god please let me die I remember feeling something Like hope before the end I want to start again... Why does everyone Feel so far away? I don't understand What I am anymore And in the light I can see myself In a different life ******* ** *** **** It was so long ago It was so long ago... It was so long Ago