​i always run away

Song Meaning

These lyrics plunge into a chaotic world of impulsive decisions and broken promises. The speaker opens with a jarring scene of "doing lines with my ex bitch" before immediately taking "a flight on the next trip." This sets up an immediate tension: a declaration of ownership with a necklace that says, "You're mine," quickly followed by the speaker's undeniable pattern of escape. The core emotional conflict lies in the speaker's repeated, almost desperate promises—"I won't ever run away, babe"—which are instantly undermined by their actions. The chorus reveals the true catalyst: "shit don't feel the same when that liquors in my veins." This isn't just about physical distance; it's an emotional retreat, where the speaker admits to "acting cold when I'm tripping off a dose," leaving behind not just belongings but also, it seems, genuine connection. The craft here is particularly sharp in its use of direct contradiction and internal monologue. The blunt confession, "I love you, I just lied," jarringly punctuated by the parenthetical "what the fuck?", captures a moment of raw self-awareness and external disbelief. This is further amplified by the later, more vulnerable admission: "I don't take it for the plane, I just take it for the pain." This shift from external flight to internal suffering adds a crucial layer of understanding to the speaker's self-destructive cycle. Ultimately, the lyrics resonate because of their unflinching honesty. They don't sugarcoat the speaker's flaws or offer easy answers. Instead, they present a cyclical struggle between a desire for connection and an overwhelming urge to flee, driven by internal pain and external substances. The constant refrain, "I always run away," becomes less a confession and more a self-fulfilling prophecy, making the listener feel the weight of this inescapable pattern.